Talk of the Town || Young Professional Series

If you’ve been horse showing long enough, it’s hard not to notice that there is always an undertone edge. Whispers about how much so and so paid for their new horse, gossip about who is sleeping with who, hisses about how he/she are clueless, rumors that so and so’s business is tanking.

This sort of thing is not exclusive to the horse world. If you attended even a day of high school you experienced society’s need to stir the pot.

Growing up in a world of hearsay, while being told you need to keep up with the Joneses makes for a young individual afraid to make mistakes while terrified, he/she will be the focal point of next slew of ringside whispers.

“She can’t even ride.”

“He won once and thinks he knows what he is doing.”

“What a stupid mistake letting her client buy that horse.”

“He is going to ruin that horse.”

“She’s too… this, that, and the other.”

I’m not a clean slate and I’m definitely not pointing fingers as I’m just as guilty of some of these whispers.

Shame on me.

As a young professional, I want to do better by myself, by my clients, and by this industry that I want to continue to grow. Anyone seeking to do the same, cozy on up—unfortunately, the gossip kingdom is here to stay but these are the ways I’ve learn to navigate within it.

Root of the problem.

My mom always taught me to work it backwards. I have to ask myself constantly when confronted with the negativity, “Why were they that mean? What would cause them to react that way or to say such things?”

In the moment, IT IS NOT EASY. But it definitely takes me out of the hot seat (at least in my own head lol.) I don’t feel the need to shoulder the shame of being “called out” or feel the need to word vomit reactively in return.

Work it backwards and then apply the golden rule.

Not everyone will buy in.

When you start as a young professional, in some small way you’re declaring to the world… “I’d like to try this on my own. Here goes nothing!”

Good for you. Stay humble but also stand firm on your own two feet.

As you grow and acquire new clients, some will push you and your ideas. They’ll question everything. This can be a good thing, if you’re like me and LOVE questions, but it can also be disconcerting. Sometimes it feels like you can already hear them walking away, running to the next trainer telling them how you knew nothing or how your program was just subpar.

*cue those ringside whispers*

Here is the kicker. Let ‘em walk, let ‘em talk. They just don’t buy in and THAT IS OKAY.

The horse world is full of diversity. Some will not agree with you. You will not agree with some. What they think about you truly is none of your business (and I wholeheartedly understand how much easier said than done that can be.) Without the diversity you would be bound to do everything exactly the same way everyone else does. What a boring place to work and live.

Eye on the passion.

If you started as a young professional because you wanted all the acknowledgement that you indeed do know what you’re doing and want the world to watch you prove it…I understand where you’re coming from. I understand the need to feel like I have to prove myself. Deep down, I want people to believe I belong to be here, and I know I can prove it.

BUT and this is a big but…if you’re hinging your career as a young professional solely on this belief and nothing else, your career will be short lived and/or you will become bitter and self-absorbed.

*Again, cue those ringside whispers*

Check last month’s post, Do You Know Your Why, for a more in-depth understanding of how this mindset will fail you.

People will talk, and sometimes no matter how much you try, they just won’t like you. It seems in the horse world we all start out as friends until you become a threat. Keep your eye on the prize; whether that’s because you get to ride 8 horses a day and get paid for it, whether it's because you get to pass down generations of knowledge to the little girl who wants to take her 4H pony to State, or that you get to represent a nation amongst some of the best athletes of our time.

The gossip won’t stop. It throws me off my game from time to time because I just want to be HERE so badly. I’m not perfect. I can’t be.

But, I can be kind.

I can be understanding.

I can be supportive.

I can be assertive.

I can be smart.

I can be open-minded.

I can ask for help.

I can reach for my goals.

I can help others.

I can make this business my own.

I can let them wonder why I’m still smiling.

*cue those ringside whispers*